This Is Why I'm Hot Read online

  "Do you not remember how I was when we first met?" He chuckled, shaking his head slightly where it rested against the top of mine again.

  Wait. Did that mean… "You think I'm attractive, Boyd?" I asked teasingly.

  I felt him tense slightly before sighing. "Of course, I do."

  "Oh." Warmth swept through me, making my heart race. "Thank you," I whispered, reaching up to pull my hair over the side of my face, even though it was still mostly buried against his neck.

  My movements must have made him think I was getting uncomfortable, because he pulled back to look down at me before reaching up and pushing my hand away from the side of my face and brushing my hair back.

  "You have to stop trying to make people more comfortable with something they should never feel uncomfortable about in the first place," he whispered softly. "You're gorgeous and so is that birthmark because it's a part of you."

  I swallowed hard, blinking up at him. "Okay."

  Damn, it's hard not to be crazy about a man who is just so genuinely kind. Who the hell was this man? Who was this damn perfect?

  "Promise?" He asked, sliding a finger over the darkened skin streaked across my cheek.

  "I promise I'll try."

  He smiled, making me want to sigh with the sweetness of it. Again, I wished I could skip work and stay here all day with Boyd, but I'd purposely asked for Sundays at the sandwich shop for a reason to leave the next day, because I was terrified I would end up overstaying my welcome, and if I didn't leave soon, I was going to be late and would possibly have to skip the shower when I got home.

  Spending the entire day smelling like Boyd and trying to hide and erection sounded exhausting.

  I sighed, moving away from him to head over to where I'd tossed my clothes and started getting dressed.

  "You know, you weren't all that awkward to me when we first met. A bit nervous, but that was understandable."

  He huffed, groaning. "That was only because you were so understanding. Trust me. It gets pretty bad."

  Humming, I looked around for my shoes before remembering that I'd kicked them off by the door in the front room. I moved back over to Boyd, who was still standing there in nothing but his boxers, looking absolutely delicious… and still hard, though I tried really hard not to look. I wrapped my arms around him again, needing another hug before I left because I was absolutely addicted to being held by this man, and I should probably be the one paying him.

  "Well, despite this awkwardness that you seem to think is keeping you from fining the man of your dreams, you should know that you're one of the best people I know. Some really smart omega is going to put a ring on you some day and not look back."

  How very desperately I wished that could be me… but I just worked for the agency that worked for him.

  "Thank you," he whispered, and I smiled, knowing it wasn't easy for him to accept compliments.

  The guy really didn't understand his worth. When I finally pulled away, I knew I was probably going to be a little late for work, but I couldn’t regret getting to spend even a few more minutes in his arms.

  I quickly moved toward the door, glancing over my shoulder. He gave me a small smile and a wave, and my stomach swooped dramatically.

  Damn. I'm a goner.

  ***

  "You've been taking more shifts lately," Dani said, pressing up next to me, and bumping me with her hip. "Not that I'm complaining, but what's up? Did you stop cuddling?"

  "Uh," I said distractedly as I went over the list of toppings going on the sandwich I was making. "Not completely, but I only have one client now."

  Yep, that's where I found myself. I'd pulled back from cuddling almost completely, because after cuddling Boyd regularly, I found that cuddling others felt forced and unnatural, and I could tell they were starting to feel the wall I'd started to build between us. Thankfully, the new guy was more than happy to take over my other clients. He seemed really nice, and from what I'd heard from the feedback coming in, really good at what he did.

  Dani smirked, wagging her eyebrows. "The alpha?"

  I blushed, biting my lip. "Yeah. I've never met anyone like him."

  There was a terrifying pterodactyl squeal and I jumped, pausing in pulling out a few slices of tomatoes to look over and shush her.

  "I knew you liked him," she whisper-yelled, leaning close.

  Groaning, I let my head fall back on my shoulders. "I can't help it. He's perfect. I don't want him snuggling some other omega."

  I'd never been much of a possessive person before. The very few boyfriends I'd had in my life were either into me, or they weren't. I'd always had way too much going on in my life to have to worry about some alpha who didn't want me anyway. But this one, I thought I might feel if he ended up liking snuggling with some other omega better than he liked snuggling with me.

  Did it make me that omega that I would prefer he didn't even get the chance to find out? The one that didn't care how I ended up with him just as long as I ended up with him? Insert cringe face emoji.

  "Why don't you just ask him out?" Dani said, like it was so fucking simple. "Then you could snuggle him all the time without an appointment."

  What kind of world did she think we were living in. That was crazy talk.

  Curling my lip, I put the top piece of bread on the sandwich, grabbing toothpicks to secure it. "I don't know if he'll want to."

  "All he can do is say no."

  "I hate when people say that," I said, grabbing the knife and sending her a glare out of the corner of my eye. "Trust me, rejection can be pretty painful. Especially this one."

  ***

  Just like every Saturday, when I woke up in the morning, my entire body went into a state of anticipation and excitement. I was just hours away from my weekly evening with one of my favorite people in the entire world, and I skipped through the whole day on a wave of excitement.

  I'd managed to get scheduled at the sandwich shop out of necessity because one of the girls who usually worked then had requested off and it was expected to be a pretty busy evening, and even being down one person would be complete chaos, but I wasn't too worried since I'd be off way before time to head to Boyd's.

  Well, I wasn't too worried… until I showed up at the sandwich shop for my shift, only to find out that Benny was going to be a couple hours late due to being stuck out of town without a ride in, so his roommate was going to have to go pick him up and bring him back into town. Unfortunately, that would make me late for my session with Boyd.

  And of course, because I was trying to keep things as professional as possible with Boyd, and he'd never asked for my number, I'd also never asked for his, and therefore had to call the agency before they closed at four to let him know that I wouldn't be there at eight, but I'd get there as soon as I could.

  I felt bad about it, but I didn't think it would really be all that big a deal, since I usually ended up staying the night there anyway… which really made it even stranger that I didn't even have his phone number, and I was still using the agency as a reason to go see him instead of just claiming him as a friend.

  Sometimes, I don't even make sense to myself.

  We were so busy during the dinner rush, I didn't have time to check my phone when I felt it vibrate in my pocket right before four o'clock, and as excited as I was to see Benny come rushing in a little after eight, since it meant I would only be about thirty minutes late for my session with Boyd, opening my phone and finding a message from the agency ruined that excitement pretty quickly.

  Tim: We got Tate scheduled with Mr. Foster for tonight. I just wanted to let you know, so you didn't worry.

  Fuck! I glanced at the time. Even if I skipped a shower and hustled, I probably wasn't going to make it before Tate got there, and I didn't have his number to call him off. But I couldn't just not go.

  I moved as fast as I could, hoping Boyd would maybe let me use his shower when I got there… if he wasn't already cuddled up on his bed with Tate.

  My stoma
ch dropped at the thought that he might actually do just that. Tate was a beautiful man, slightly taller and definitely had more shape to him than I did. His face was model perfect without a single blemish, and he had a sweet, happy smile that proved he was more than some shallow jerk who only cared about himself.

  He'd probably have no trouble putting Boyd at ease with his soft-spoken sweetness.

  What if Boyd decided he liked cuddling with Tate more? What if they started dating?

  My mind was racing, and I was seriously thinking about turning around when I pulled down the long, dirt driveway that led to Boyd's house. Tate's car was already in the driveway, and I pulled in next to it, hoping maybe he was still in it and running late, but the engine was off.

  Damn. I was too late. He was already in there, probably happily snuggling my alpha. They'd fall madly in love, and have perfect, beautiful kids, and I would die alone, bitter and depressed because of that one time I missed my session with Boyd and drove him into the arms of another man.

  I was so lost in my over-the-top dramatic thoughts, I almost missed when the front door opened and Tate walked through it, smiling over his shoulder and waving at someone back inside the house.

  The door shut behind him and Tate trotted down the steps, looking confused, and clearly becoming more so when he saw me sitting in my car next to his.

  Groaning, I climbed out of my car, smiling sheepishly at him and giving him a small wave over the top of the car. "Hey."

  "Hinton! I thought you weren't going to be able to make it," Tate said brightly, looking genuinely happy to see me.

  "I didn't think I was. At least, not until later. Tim was supposed to let Boyd know I'd be late, but he scheduled you instead." I nodded toward the house, watching the light in the living room turn out. "What happened?"

  He hadn't been in there long enough to actually have a cuddle session, and I tried not to show my relief, but the soft smile on Tate's face told me I might not have hidden it as well as I'd have liked.

  "He told me he'd still pay for the session, but he didn't need my services tonight," Tate said, shrugging. "He was really nice… just maybe not interested in snuggling with me."

  "I promise it's not you. We just kinda have a routine." I licked my lips, feeling a little exposed as Tate watched my face knowingly. "He feels comfortable with me."

  Tate nodded, doing his best to hide his smile, but I could see the way his lips quivered. "Gotcha. He's really a sweet man, Hinton. I'm glad someone like him has someone like you."

  I started to argue, feeling like I needed to tell him that he didn't have me, and I didn't have him, but when I opened my mouth, I couldn't bring myself to say those words. The truth was, if I thought for a moment that Boyd might want to be mine and for me to be his, I would jump at the opportunity happily. "He really is a good guy. Sorry about all the confusion. I'll make sure you get paid for tonight."

  "Thanks." He hesitated for a moment, chewing on his bottom lip. "You know, maybe you guys should have a talk. You haven't taken anyone besides him since I've started working, and he doesn't seem to want to take anyone else either. It might be time to change up your arrangement a bit."

  I blinked, nodding absently. I knew I wasn't brave enough to take the steps he was talking about. Not without some sign that any of that would be welcome at all from Boyd first. "I'll think about it."

  It wasn't necessarily a lie. I knew I'd think about that particular thing a lot, but mostly, it would be to fantasize about what life would be like if I could claim Boyd as my alpha.

  I watched Tate get in his car and pull away after waving at me, and I smiled, taking a deep breath as I walked toward Boyd's house. I'd made this trek so many times, but this time… more so than all the others, my heart was racing.

  Maybe I should turn around and get back in my car. He wouldn't even have to know that I'd come. But then I'd have to wait until the following week to go spend time with him. I didn't want to have to wait that long. It was hard enough sometimes waiting an entire week to see him. I really didn't want to wait two.

  But what the hell was I going to tell him when it came to the agency. What if he worried he'd get charged for both Tate and me? I could tell him right off the bat that he wouldn't, but then I'd be admitting that I was willing to do our sessions for free. Would knowing that make him realize it was more to me than a job for me? And would that be a good thing that would lead to me maybe getting to spend more time with him? Or would it end up being a bad thing that would lead to me not getting to see him anymore at all?

  I groaned, dropping my head forward as I stepped up onto the porch, knowing full well I wasn't going to turn around and go back. Regardless of everything, I really wanted to spend some time with him, and I was just selfish enough to not completely care about the consequences.

  The front door swung open before I even had a chance to knock and I gasped, chuckling softly when I looked up at Boyd's surprised face, just as he flipped on the light.

  "Hinton!" He said excitedly, stepping out directly in front of me and pulling me into a hug. "Is everything okay?"

  I sighed happily, melting into his arms. "Yeah. Just a small scheduling conflict, but I think I have it fixed now."

  "Good. They sent someone else," he said, pressing his face into the top of my head. "I hope I didn't hurt his feelings. He was really nice. I just…" He shrugged. "I got the message earlier, but it was after business hours when I read it. I must have missed it when it came in. I couldn't get ahold of anyone to let them know not to send a replacement." He frowned, pulling back to look down at me. "And how dangerous is that? As long as they have someone scheduled to go into other people's houses on the weekend, they should definitely have someone at the office just in case something happens I could have been a murderer."

  I giggled, pressing closer again, just happy he seemed glad to see me and not irritated and sending me away. "We all have a person we call if things go wonky."

  "Well, that's… something, I guess. It still seems dangerous."

  "We usually tell people the location of the place we'll be too, and I time frame for checking in. Not everyone does it, but most do."

  "Do you?"

  "Not anymore. I haven't taken on anyone I don't know in a long time, so I don't have to right now.

  "You… you don't have to give it to me if you're nervous about it, but could I get your number? So, I can get ahold of you directly? Don't feel bad if you don't feel comfortable," he added on quickly.

  I smiled, rubbing my cheek against his chest. "Yeah. That would actually be great."

  "Were you planning on coming inside? Or did you…"

  "I'm coming in!" I said quickly, snapping my head up and nearly nailing him in the nose. "Sorry. I… If it's okay with you, I'd like to come in. Don't worry, you don't have to pay for this session."

  "I will! I don't want you to have to do this for free."

  I swallowed hard, pulling away to drag him along behind me as I opened the front door to his house. "Come on. Let's just get in bed. I'm tired."

  He chuckled, following along behind me. We stripped like always once we hit his bedroom, and I paused, cringing slightly.

  "I didn't get to take a shower. I got the message that they sent Tate, and I wanted to make it here before…" I trailed off, fully aware I'd been about to admit that I hadn't wanted him cuddling with Tate and hoping he wouldn't ask me to finish that statement. "I probably stink."

  "You smell amazing," he whispered, blinking in surprise after a moment and shaking his head. "But if you want a shower, you are more than welcome to use mine. I don't really have anything that will fit you, but you can wear one of my shirts while I wash your clothes."

  "Thank you," I whispered, feeling shy.

  He grabbed a shirt for me out of his drawer and I held it out, giggling at just how huge the thing was going to be on me. He glanced at it and laughed too, ushering me toward the shower.

  "Strip and toss your clothes out here. I'll put them in the wash
er."

  When the door shut, I stripped down, not even bothering to flip the lock since I had no doubt that Boyd would never open the door on me. I blushed again when I took my underwear off, suddenly aware just how naked I was going to be under that parachute of a shirt when I climbed in bed with him.

  He had his back to the door when I tossed my clothes out, and butterflies flapped rambunctiously in my stomach. I was completely naked, and he was standing right there. It would honestly take me moving out from behind the wood I was leaning around, and him turning around, and he'd be looking at my naked body. A small part of me wanted to pull the door open completely and call his name. To watch his eyes move over me and gauge what he thought of everything he saw.

  In the end, I whispered a thank you at his back, and eased the door closed before starting and climbing in the shower. I tried to take a quick shower, more than ready to climb in bed with him and snuggle in for the night, but there were a couple parts of my body that were still stuck on the fact that I was completely bare in Boyd's house, and I quietly cried out his name with three fingers pumping in and out of my body and my other hand wrapped around my dick in a quick release that left me panting and shaking.

  Something about knowing he was probably right there on the other side of the door, patiently waiting on me to join him, made the whole thing that much hotter.

  When I finally left the bathroom, I felt almost noodly, and I probably had a tired, almost drunk smile on my mouth as I climbed up next to him, pressing my body to his while trying to keep the oversized shirt down as well as I could.

  "I smell like you," I whispered, my eyes far too heavy to keep open. "I really like it."

  I didn't hear an answer, and I had a feeling that was because I passed out hard.

  Chapter Three

  May

  T here was a reason I hated lying. Actually, there were several, but the biggest reason I hated being the one who lied was because I was terrible at it. Like, I always felt anxious and jumpy when I lied, constantly waiting for the moment when someone would catch me in my lie, and I'd be stuck looking like a dick for lying about something ridiculous.